sl.blog

On a steamy Saturday evening the decidedly defensive-minded Lafayette Lions manhandled the Michiana Titans, making mincemeat of the visitors’ offensive game plan and capitalizing on seven turnovers to pitch a 31-0 shutout in their season opener in the Mid States Football League. Six picks by five different Lions, including those by Ernest Calloway, Jon Emmert, Jake Gilbert, Ashante Woodyard, and Mike Woodard (who had a pair), helped keep Michiana miles from the goal line. The offense, while not clicking early, eventually put points on the board.

Cue the hamstrings; I’ll get this quickly off my chest. It poured down during practice last night. Rained like a son of a gun. When your hammy hurts, a well-timed thunder and lightening shower can be like manna from heaven. But we played through the storm, leaving me undelivered from the relatively light walkthrough.

But at my age, standing on muscles made of Rice Krispies Treats (just waiting for that snap, crackle, and pop) even a night without pads can prove dangerous. I put my legs through their paces, knowing I run like a man just released from a walker by some backwoods preacher at a tent revival meeting. It stinks, too, because in my youth I had a dash of speed. I was white lightening in the early ’80s—not a real nickname, just a vision I had of myself in private times. Of course, a lot of my teammates hadn’t even spilled out of their papas’ trousers in the early ’80s. 

Today, I tucked myself sideways into my tiny car, thinking only of hitting the black market for an old-fashioned Brett Favre painkiller cocktail. My ass feels weighted with anvils and Advil ain’t cutting it. Who among you, friends, has had a recent root canal? Let’s make a deal. Tonight: hydration, a novena, and peanut butter and banana sandwiches; I don’t think the King ever pulled up lame.

But it’s been a bit of a rough preseason for the Lions. Players made of far sturdier stuff than I are walking around without helmets on. Player/coaches, forehead-bleeding linebackers, and veteran running backs have all been hampered or temporarily shelved with everything from outrageous blood numbers to torn ligaments and muscles to various gridiron strains. Even from my insider/outsider perspective, I know that the sideline designation is killing these guys. The guys who’ve played for years, who’ve rehabbed from serious injuries, who’ve made deals with wives for one or two more seasons. Football is a game I can, and probably should be, living without, but I suspect the pain of not playing is pretty big for these Lions.

Tomorrow brings the Michiana Titans to town for the home opener. We could sure use your support. And don’t forget it’s “Pirate Night” at the old ball field. Come all gussied up as Blackbeard or any other swashbuckler and the ticket folks will let you in for five bucks. Put an eye patch or hook on your buckaroos under 12, and they’ll get in absolutely free. Lions roar at 7:30.
 

Most men of moderate sanity might pursue milder forms of leisurely diversions once their high school and college playing days end. Golf, softball, and Friday night poker would certainly suffice for many; they’re sounding better and better to me. With “two-a-days” a distant memory, it is perhaps only the most foolhardy who sign up for two football practices a week during the dog days of summer. Yet that’s what is asked of players on the Lafayette Lions.

Beneath a waxing moon about two or three days from full, the Lafayette Lions took on the South Central Broncos last Saturday in a preseason battle. Both teams showed up in black jerseys, which is perhaps equivalent to a handful of women all wearing the same black cocktail dress at a party. On this night, however, the Lions would win the catfight: 20-18.

Offensively, the home team looked strongest at the beginning of each half. Quarterbacks Marshall Keith and Carl Buergler led their respective units down the field to touchdowns. Keith also tossed a touchdown pass to Jeremy Lawley as the clock expired in the first half, giving the home boys a 13-10 lead. But the special teams didn’t look fit for the Special Olympics. After the opening score, kicker Shawn Haley had to make a touchdown-saving tackle on his first kickoff of the year. One touched punt gave the ball back to the Broncos, and rust and rookie inexperience may have helped keep the game closer on the scoreboard than it was on the field.